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bethdurling

The Sacred Merging of You and God

"Have you ever been asked, 'Did you talk to God about it?' or heard phrases like 'Did you pray about it?' or 'What does God have to say about it?' If you grew up in a conservative faith-based culture like I did, these questions were likely part of your daily life. I remember as a child, I would lay my head on the pillow each night and have a conversation with God because I was taught I was supposed to catch Him up on the day, then thank Him, then make my requests, and conclude with an 'Amen.' This practice was deeply ingrained in me until the day I had my awakening.


One morning, during my meditation, I experienced something somewhat metaphysical and transformative. I show up on my mat most days to meditate, and here and there, an experience will find me. It's rare, but when it does, it's profound. Here is what happened: All was quiet in my mind, and I could feel my breath, which was rich and spacious, and I sunk down into my quiet space where I can't really tell if I am sitting up or floating out. That's the sweet spot.


And then, out of nowhere, an encounter. I saw God. He was vast, radiant, a light in the sky, illuminating half of the universe. I just stayed in this space, enjoying the love and peace of this awareness. I knew it was God. All consciousness. I just honored the offering He was giving me to be that near. And then, this divine light quietly, without hesitation, seemed to pinch a little piece of Himself, which He then flicked into the sky right next to Him, which transformed into a very small glimmer of light against the dark universal backdrop, and in that moment... I came into being.


There was a subtle yet profound dialogue between this newly created essence and the divine source, which felt characterized by feelings of gratitude and peace. I could not hear any of it. I just observed this remarkable peek into the past. And it was beautiful. I observed the conversation's gentleness, which seemed to be beyond words, but what I knew in that moment was that I saw myself, and I saw God.


I saw God as the creator, as the source, and as the essence of all existence. It was a realization that I had know. You see, I had always struggled with the prescribed way of talking to God. It felt strange to share experiences with someone or something who had already lived the experience with me. And, in this vision, I felt a profound validating connection, a sense that I was a part of God. I knew that I was connected to God, not as a separate entity, but as an extension of Him.


This knowing was beyond belief; it was an unshakable truth to my knowing. Today, I understand that I am a part of the source, and the source is a part of me. I was given the honor of watching my own creation unfold, my first birth, and it was a revelation that sealed my known truth.

So, here is the thought. Why would I continue to speak to God as if we were separate beings? He has witnessed my every moment, my every experience, and my every thought. It felt absurd to recount stories to Him as if He hadn't been there the entire time. He knows my thoughts before I have them, when I am sitting, when I am rising. My words before they come to my tongue. Psalm 139. He knows.


He was in the experience.


The truth is that God is not separate from us; He exists within and around us. He is my right hand. (Psalm 16:8) It is Christ who Lives in Me. (Galatians 2:20) The Spirit of God dwells in me. (Romans 8) We are connected to the Source; we are Him. This realization has always been with me since childhood, a merging of God within and through me.


I hold no judgment toward the conservative Christian tradition or any other religious practice that encourages outward worship. I love the outward expression of prayer and worship and practice these methods, which in turn draw me to God and into His presence. These sacred practices have the power to bring individuals closer to the divine, and that's something I wholeheartedly cherish. I don't concern myself with how people find their path; what matters is that there are practices that can bring balance to our human experience and lead us to the awareness that Christ is enough and that He is, in fact, within us.


If you carry judgment or condemnation due to societal conditioning or religious teachings, I encourage you to let it go. Some offer an outward expression, and others go inward, finding the Christ inside. Christ, in you, has been with you all day, witnessing your every moment. You can close your eyes, imagine your deepest desires manifesting, and connect with God, in you, around you, sharing your love and receiving His in return. This is the essence of true love and connection. This is Christ manifest. And, maybe it is the sweet spot, the core of scripture, the embodiment of Christ consciousness, and our promise. Let go of condemnation and let your head rest. Allow God to merge within and through you, for He has been your witness throughout the day, and there is no separateness.


Imagine a partner or significant other. When they climb into bed, just being there is enough. Their beautiful body, next to yours, no words are needed because the two becoming one is more than enough. Christ is already there, was already there and was your witness. How comforting. Can it be enough? Is Christ in you enough? Close your eyes, breathe, and see if you find your created moment. Breathe deep and see if you can delve deep into the heart of the One in you, and around you.


As John 17:20-23 states: 'I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be One, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be One even as we are One, I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly One, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me.'


Embracing the truth that we are One with the Creator.

So beautiful.

So holy.


Photo by Alexis Peterson

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